HALLOWEEN

Yeah, yeah, I know Halloween has gone and passed, but I've been kind of busy, so I can't ALWAYS be on top of it and current with these posts.

Yes, I do realize how defensive I sound in the last sentence.  And no, I don't know why I'm responding to comments that I made up in my head.

Halloween.  (That's the scariest font I could find. Blogger has a very limited selection).

Halloween is an awesome holiday that makes absolutely no sense.  While Mexico celebrates Day of the Dead to remember their past family and friends, the U.S. celebrates Halloween. It's a pretty sacred holiday for us.  That's why we dress up in costumes that vary from princesses to bananas, go door to door of perfect strangers, threaten them with tricks if they don't give us candy, and then go home and eat all of it.

Like I said, Halloween is awesome.

I always loved Trick or Treating.  What kind of kid doesn't?  You get to dress up in a costume and collect pounds and pounds of free candy.  I remember the first Halloween I got to trick or treat with only my friends and WITHOUT my parents.  That's when I got serious about trick or treating.  We found the best route, ran to every house, and cut through yards.  Anyone who couldn't keep up got left behind.  Luckily, I had lots of skinny friends.  We would collect so much candy that we'd have to drop it off at home halfway through because our pillow cases would get too heavy.

Professional trick or treaters.  I didn't get the memo to dress like a barbie.

I used to get enough candy to last me the year.  Of course it was all the gross candy I didn't want.  Who the heck wants to eat a gummy eye ball?  Chances are it was made in China and has lead in it.  Speaking of candy, have you seen this video yet? 

I really loved dressing up in Halloween costumes.  But somehow people always assumed that I was a boy.  One year I dressed like a scarecrow.  Hey, I looked adorable.  Anyway, an old lady kept saying I was such a cute farm boy.  I was so mad.  Yes, I was wearing a plaid shirt and overalls, but my face was also painted like a scarecrow.  FARM BOYS DON'T WEAR FACE PAINT!  A different year I dressed like a soccer player.  Only I added an afro, buck teeth, and over-sized ears to the costume.  People kept on calling me a boy.  I've also dressed like an elephant, dinosaur, and a fish.  I'm starting to see a theme here...

That's Lily, but I wore it too.

Halloween is just innocent fun when you're a kid.  And then those kids grow up and go to college.  And then they corrupt Halloween. 

Halloween is no longer about dressing up to get candy, it's about dressing up to get laid.  At least that's what I assume when I see all the pictures of girls dressed up like sluts.  Oh sorry, I meant sexy bunnies and nurses.  So if your costume was "sexy" and you posted pictures on facebook, chances are I looked at them and laughed at you.  And that's the honest truth.

But I'm not gonna hate on you if you decided to dress a little slutty for one night of the year.  I get it.  The thing that makes me mad is when mormon girls go to mormon parties dressed like skanks.  THAT makes me mad.  It makes everyone else around them uncomfortable, and it lets every guy around them know that they're ready for a NCMO.  (If you're not familiar with BYU lingo, that's short for non-committal make out).

Moving on...now I will post some pictures of my never ending Halloween weekend.  Pictures that prove I was social.  THREE nights in a row.

Thursday night I went salsa dancing with Jenai and Ashley.  I was a raccoon. 

 Friday night we hit up the Asian Ward dance and then went to the dance party at Alpine Village.  If you were wondering, that's where all the skanks were.

I wasn't a very good mime.  I still talked a lot.

 Saturday night I dressed like a chola for our ward party.  I was a chola last year too, but the only piece of clothing I repeated was the bandana.  I'm proud of that fact.

This year.

Last year.

It just bugs me when I go to Party Station and the only women's costumes are some form of lingerie.  So please don't hate me if I offended you; maybe I just hate the girls in sexy costumes because I'm jealous.
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Nope.  That's a lie.